Honesty IS the Best Policy (except . . . . . )

Here is a great article that everyone should read.  John Loeb is spot on.  I want to dive a little bit further into his “rule no. 9:” “A reputation for fair and honest dealing will be your greatest asset.”  While I might not always follow “rule no. 9,” I am generally very honest with people in my personal and professional relationships.  BUT, I find that this honesty gets me into trouble sometimes . . . .

 

The reason I get into trouble is that I have a tendency to be bluntly honest.  I say the EXACT truth instead of using strategies to mitigate the harshness of my honesty.  Like any good Management Consultant, my father has tried to teach me two ways to avoid getting myself into trouble when speaking the truth:

1. Change the tone of the discussion (i.e. say “that isn’t quite right” vs. “YOU are wrong”)
2. Wait a day before making the comment – you will generally think over the statement or situation and be able to approach it in a more constructive way vs. an accusatory way

 

I have noticed that in my personal life, being bluntly honest should be mitigated with the above two techniques because individuals tend to be more sensitive to their friend’s opinions (especially women – please please I know I'm generalizing so don’t get mad!).  On the professional side, though, I have gained a lot of long-term good will from telling the precise truth, no matter how much it hurts.  People will trust that I am giving them my full opinion instead of skirting around an issue or flat-out lying.  Over the course of my career at NSR I definitely raised a lot of hell about certain issues I didn’t agree with but my relationship with my former colleagues actually grew rather then suffer.  In fact, even if there was some sort of professional issue, my personal relationship with my colleague’s did not suffer – i.e. no awkwardness in grabbing some drinks even if we were in the middle of a professional spat.  I think my father still finds this astounding because he knows how blunt I can be!  My advice is to develop a reputation for blunt honestly so that people expect it. 

End of an Era: My Last Day at NSR – It has been a pleasure!

Forgive me, I have been trying to send out an email to everyone outside of NSR informing them of my new contact info but unfortunately the NSR server won’t let me send out so many emails at once.  More importantly (for me) stupid Facebook won’t let me export the email addresses or at least send a mass fb message to all my friends.  What a pain.  Regardless below is the email I sent to NSR – I believe it has the right touch of humor and good will to maintain my bridges with them going forward.  Look for an email from me with my new contacts as soon as I figure out a solution.

 

Dear All,

As my tenure at NSR comes to an end I have had the chance to reflect on the my past 2 years here; I am proud of the firm and how much progress we have made.  I remember my initial few months with the firm in early 2007 when we had offices in the Hilton towers and were doing everything from looking for deals to designing offices (and in my case, buying the coffee machine – thank you very much!).  Since then we have made significant progress in becoming a world-class private equity firm and have some of the smartest investing professionals in India.  We have also established some great investment screening and monitoring processes (which we always strive to improve).  Most importantly, we have developed great personal and professional relationships with all of our colleagues (from Mumbai to NYC to Dubai; from founding partners to Assistants). 

 

I think I am a better person for having worked with you all both because I grew my professional skill set and because I have made some great friends.  I will really miss this place and I hope that I get the chance to work together again with some of you in the future (I envision a future where I can boss Harsha and Nithin around!). 

It is unclear what my plans are for the future but I intend to do a little bit of “soul searching” and obviously have some fun (re: bridge classes!) before I figure out what the next step is.  Importantly, I plan to remain in India where I feel the maximum amount of opportunity lies.

 

I plan to keep in touch with all of you and insist that you be nice when I call you to ask for advice, introductions or most importantly cash!